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This blog is about music videos. If you want to know what I think of the songs, you can find my exciting and witty opinions at The Singles Jukebox.

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Paul Oakenfold - Southern Sun.

Best of 2002: Well ‘best’ is probably pushing it, but I challenge you to get through this video without making a noise along the lines of ‘pffffffffnyaaaaaaahaaaa’.

During a photoshoot, a model finds a couple of magic ice cubes (???) and suddenly realises the inherent SHALLOWNESS and FAKENESS of the fashion world where she is beholden to THE MAN. Naturally she immediately legs it over to the Clarks Magic Steps forest to get in touch with her inner 10-year-old. Verrrry slowwwwly and seriously.

I’ve watched this four times now and I still can’t keep a straight face at 3.11, when things elevate to a whole new level.

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DB Boulevard - Point Of View.

Best of 2002: Cardboard loveliness from some Italian dudes with a sharp stanley knife. Everything’s going wrong for our heroine - she’s skint, her car won’t start, and as for the man of her dreams: "We have split UP!" But she keeps on smiling and we know everything’s going to be sweet. Like chocolate.

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Tweet ft Missy Elliott - Oops (Oh My).

Best of 2002: Tweet has turned Superman’s North Pole ice palace into a snazzy hotel with all mod cons (incl. hot running water which you’d have thought would have caused some practical issues but never mind), yeti-fur rugs, and plenty of backing dancers available via room service.

Tweet fought off stiff competition for the lease from Scott of the Antarctic, Frosta from He-Man (who is a right old tart! Who knew?) and the skiing Hemulen. I give it about 3 weeks before they all pen an angry letter to Amiga Power about the whole business.

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The Rapture - House Of Jealous Lovers.

Best of 2002: I didn’t even know there was a video for this track until last week, let alone one featuring a giant skeleton duck rampaging through the streets of New York (and doing a shit down a chimney whilst being fired on by a tank). Not even Superted with his brand new kung-fu skills can halt its destructive progress.

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Kylie Minogue - Come Into My World.

Best of 2002: There’s only one way to follow up a super-stylised video like ‘Can’t Get You Out Of My Head' and that's with a mesmerising glimpse into Kylie's daily routine, out and about picking up her dry cleaning, oblivious to the chaos she's causing by superimposing the many-worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics onto her local high street. Kylie may be denying the reality of wavefunction collapse but give her a break - she's in love and the mundane world seems filled with bunnies and rainbows to her. Let's hope she doesn't bump into any awkward paradoxes on the zebra crossing.

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